True love endures: Remembering the husband who forgot his own love story

Their love story may be comparable to that of the movie "50 First Dates" and the Korean film "A Moment to Remember."

In the middle of their marriage, he suddenly could no longer remember the part of his life spent in her company. Permanent memory loss built a wall of uncertainty between them and strained their relationship. 

 

It was love the second time around for Faith Bacon and Jeland de Guzman, who was her second husband. But he had always wanted her; Jeland seized his chance when Faith and her first husband separated.

He didn't just court her—he wooed the entire family, from her parents to her son. He eventually won her love and they made their own family, adding a girl and a boy under their wings.

For a long while, everything was going well—until Typhoon Reming came into their lives. 

 

A loss of memory

 

Jeland, who was a disaster respondent, traveled to the Bicol region in 2006 to help with the rehabilitation efforts after Typhoon Reming hit the region. 

 

A bad fall caused him to hit his head hard and wake up with fragmented memories. Unfortunately, those memories did not go past his high school days—nothing of Faith, their children, and so much more.  

 

After the accident, Jeland became irritable when he used to be gentle. Faith said it was because he got frustrated with himself for being unable to remember so much. The family also got frustrated with him, but not at him, she stressed. 

 

He didn't want to hear phrases like "noong araw, ganito ka" and asked his family not to remind him of his old ways. 

 

Their youngest took Jeland's changes the hardest. He was spoiled, being his dad's favorite. But everything changed after the accident. 

True to himself

Although coping with the challenges brought by the memory loss was difficult, Jeland was still the same person. In the end, Faith and Jeland and the entire family "slipped into it."

 

"In spite of his memory loss, he never lost his real self," Faith insisted.  

 

Their daughter Ayn also said, "(Jeland's) father figure (quality) has always been there." When she gave birth to a baby girl, Jeland quit his job to take care of his granddaughter full time. 

 

"Yung pagso-spoil niya sa mga anak niya, nabaling niya kay Amber (Ayn's baby) kasi parang nagbubuo muli siya ng memories. Nakalimutan niya na ata maging daddy eh. Lahat ng gusto ng apo niya, binibigay niya." 

 

Nightmare on Christmas Day 

 

But life is a series of ups and downs, as Jeland's loved ones were about to learn. Five years after the fated accident, he passed away due to a heart attack on Christmas Day.

It was the family's first Christmas out of town. They woke up to a lifeless Jeland, whom they just spent time eating Noche Buena and opening gifts with the night before. 

 

Jeland's last Christmas happened to be the first one he completed all nine nights of Simbang Gabi. Faith said that there were even nights when he went to the church alone. 

 

Faith believes he was happy in his last moments. 

 

Memories of a husband
 

 

To the De Guzman family, Jeland's passing is unreal. He was their funny man and there was never a dull moment in the house with him around. 

 

According to Faith, they were inseparable as a couple.

"People would always say, 'When you see Faith, you look behind, Jeland is always there. When you see Jeland, you know that Faith is not far behind...' We were always together," Faith shared. 

 

However, this changed when Jeland's heart started having trouble. Faith refrained from asking him to go out with her, but her husband would always patiently wait for Faith whatever time she arrived home from work. No questions asked as long as he knew her location and how she would find her "way home to him." 

 

She added, "The thing I miss most now (about Jeland) is pag-uwi mo (may) katabi (ka). Gigisingin ko pa 'yan (if) I have a story to tell. He would wake up and he would listen to me kahit antok na antok na siya." 

 

First Undas without Jeland
 

Faith said that they used to go to Manila North Cemetery every Oct. 31 to visit the grave of Jeland's father. But this year's Undas, Faith said her family will just stay at home. Jeland's remains were cremated and his urn rests in their house. 

 

As his first death anniversary nears, the family he left in behind is still in disbelief, although Faith believed that they were already okay. They are currently going through grief counseling. 

 

Despite losing what was essentially a huge chunk of his life, Jeland was a faithful husband and devoted father. What is important is that he strove to make new memories to make up for the loss of the old ones, and that those he left behind will be able to keep many of the memories—whether it was those he lost or those he made anew—alive.

 

After all, true love endures—even if it doesn't remember. — VC, GMA News