Michelle Madrigal opens up about battle with postpartum depression: 'All of a sudden, umiiyak ako'

Michelle Madrigal opened up about how she struggled with postpartum depression after giving birth to her daughter a few years back.

On her YouTube channel, she sat down with her friend actress-model Carla Humphries in a vlog titled "LA Trip + Adulting 101" where she discussed her mental health.

Michelle had flown to the United States to follow her dreams to pursue the culinary arts, and it was there she met Troy Woolfolk, whom she later married and had a daughter with.

The online fitness coach and mom talked about how the changes after giving birth affected her, especially since she didn't have a support system in the US.

"Even before the pandemic, it was already rough for me for the whole year or two. First, having a child on its own without any family members, mahirap. I didn't know how to figure it out," she said. "I didn't invite anybody. It was just me when I gave birth. There was me and Troy and his parents, but his parents lived three hours away from us."

"Iyon iyong mahirap na parang wala pala akong support here. And then the transition to stay-at-home mom, finding myself... I had postpartum depression. Six months," she added.

Michelle said she wasn't sure what she was going through at that time since there were only a few who talked about the struggles of motherhood at that time.

"Even after giving birth, moms talk about the beauty. 'Oh my gosh, breastfeeding this and that.' But in reality, people should really talk about what goes on," she said.

"What happens after giving birth? What you really feel? Now, siguro, mas open na mga tao because more women are actually sharing their stories," she added.

Michelle said there are times when she would suddenly break down while breastfeeding her child without knowing the reason why.

"But yeah, for me talaga, sometimes magbe-breastfeed ako and you think, 'Oh, you're giving her all the nutrients. You're taking care of that baby.' Then all of a sudden, umiiyak ako. I don't know why," she recalled. "Breastfeeding and then nakatulala lang ako and then, you know, breakdown. What's going on?"

Aside from breaking down out of the blue, Michelle also experience intense mood swings.

"There are days na I'll tell Troy, 'Just feed the baby. I don't want to get out of bed.' And then there'll be days na sobrang high na I'm really, really happy… and then at night time, parang I don't want to talk to anybody. Paiba-iba talaga iyong moods," she said.

"You're there, you see your child, and you're happy. But, at the same time, parang hindi mo alam iyong feeling deep down?" she added.

Michelle learned from her doctors that her depression was due to the major and changes in her life that happened all at once including childbirth.

"For me, it was harder because of the transition itself. Not just giving birth, but like moving away from my comfort zone. I was able to make it. Kinaya ko naman siya," she said.

Michelle also stressed the importance of mental health and mentioned how it is not given of importance in the Filipino culture.

"Sa atin kasi, Filipino culture, parang when someone says they're depressed or whatever, they don't acknowledge that. And honestly, you have to. Kasi sa atin parang, 'Oh, malungkot ka lang. Okay lang iyon. Tomorrow you’ll be fine.' Or, 'Umiyak ka lang. Huwag ka masyado mag-isip. Masyado ka nag-iisip, e," she said.

"Or you feel like you can't talk to anybody. Like, 'Oh, my mom or my dad or my sister, they don't even listen to me. They think wala lang ito. It's just in my head," she added.

Michelle stressed that, "depression is real."

She told her viewers that when someone tells them about their depression or mental health issues, they have to listen.

"You have to get to know them. You have to hear their stories because sometimes kung iyong anak mo, they come to you, it means they're asking for help," she said.

"You have to acknowledge, you have to help them out because if not, they will rely on other things," she added.

Michelle and her husband Troy tied the knot in April 2019. They welcomed their daughter Anika in 2017. —Jannielyn Ann Bigtas/JCB, GMA News