Pemberton and deception

To a normal Filipino, the testimony of Joseph Pemberton was like a thrilling tele-novela finale. A young horny man with the hopes of getting his pipes cleaned by an exotic beautiful Filipina only to find out what he managed to pick up was not the “real” thing. Then he snapped and all hell broke loose.

The outcome of the verdict in this case may be different, that is, the crime may be murder because there was evident premeditation and cruelty or it may just be homicide mitigated by passion and obfuscation. However, the uncontested facts are: (a) that there was deception and (b) it resulted in death.
 
While normal Filipinos may have not expected this twist, members of the LGBT community already had an inkling of the things to come. After all, the scenario was played out so many times in movies like The Crying Game and novels and plays like Madame Butterfly. The porno industry even coined the catchy tagline “Chicks with Dicks” to market the concept to its end-users.

The sad part is, even in the LGBT community, there is sense of reluctant acceptance and assumed guilt on the death of Jennifer Laude because there was deception. Some called it an occupational hazard while others went to the extent of blaming her that she got what she deserved.
 
Let me make it clear that, deception or not, there is no reason to kill a human being. Pemberton may have been duped but choking her to death in anger will never be justified. He may have been abused according to him but at the end of the day, the concept of “caveat emptor” still makes sense. He should have checked the goods, looked for signs and perhaps, asked the pertinent questions. Sadly, his raging hormones took over and his bigger head was subdued by the smaller one.
 
Neither am I condoning the Laude’s concealment of his or her real genitalia. However, to members of the LGBT community, deception is sometimes a necessary evil trans-genders will resort to because society is historically harsh to their kind. It is a natural reaction to public shaming and a source of validation for a trans-gender if he or she manages to deceive people. The art of blending in and camouflage is nature’s way of self-defense. In short, I am trying to explain why some trans-genders need to deceive people as a modicum of behavior in their dealings.
 
Albeit advances in technology and modern ideology, the Philippine society is largely medieval and stubbornly conservative. After all, we have a Family Code (took effect in 1988) that considers homosexuality and lesbianism in the same light as drug addiction and habitual alcoholism as a ground for annulment of marriage, if concealed or legal separation as if it was a psychological condition; a Family Code that does not recognize divorce even if Italy, the seat of the Vatican, has long made it part of its laws.
 
A trans-gender grows up subconsciously knowing he or she is not conforming to standards and worst, defying nature and God’s plan. There is already a certain amount of shame being gay. As a result, many of the gays shun organized religion not because of their inherent lack of faith but due in large part as an escape to the constant reminder that they are a sin. And that guilt never goes away if there is still a part of your being that believes in God. Every Catholic gay person lives with that dilemma every waking day of his life.
 
To a trans-gender, the shame is magnified because there is already that element of defiance. A gay person accepts his or her assigned genitalia while a trans-gender defies and even loathes it. Hence, when a trans-gender decides to live his or her life in the gender he or she feels is the correct one, often times, they leave the Philippines and seek haven in societies that are more tolerant or accepting. But not all trans-genders are given the gift of flight. To most of them left here in the Philippines, their idea of survival is centered on the concept of deception, blending in, and camouflage like nature intended; the same impulse that forces a lizard to change colors as a means of self-preservation.
 
In Laude’s case, the more people she convinced that she was a woman, the better her chances of having a good life. The irony is, a normal Filipino can easily distinguish a woman from a trans-gender. We have mastered the art of nuances and can easily spot a real woman from someone who is not. To someone like Jennifer, she has her best chances seducing foreigners like Pemberton who lack the sophistication and cultural immersion to spot a tranny from a real thing because Filipinos seldom get duped.
 
And there is an economic reason as well. She can earn her way to a sex-change operation so she will not have to worry about being discovered or perhaps meet a man who will love her in such a way an extra appendage between her legs will not even matter. The sad truth remains, Jennifer Laude was just trying to survive life the best way she knew how and she needed to deceive because she had no choice.
 
I often harped in being honest about your gender to foreigners or risk the outcome of deception. I made Thailand an example where trans-genders were properly identified by government-issued ID. They have no reason to deceive because all a foreigner had to do was ask for an ID. Hence, situations similar to Pemberton’s case would have been avoided. It may have been a lost income opportunity for Jennifer but she would still be alive. All government needed to do was recognize that trans-genders are part of Philippine society, that some of them work as prostitutes (I was told the correct term is ladyboy). In this manner, the game of deception is lessened and a ladyboy’s deadly game of Russian roulette with her customers will become a distant memory.
 
The real problem is not Joseph Pemberton or Jennifer Laude. It is our unique brand of Filipino escapism. The one where we just turn the other way and act as if there is no problem because that is more convenient. The one where we hurriedly sweep dirt under the rug because we want to create a good if not perfect impression to others.
 
There will always be a Joseph Pemberton who will kill because of hate. There will always be a Jennifer Laude who will deceive just to survive. In an ordinary world, they should not in a motel room as sexual partners. Problem is, this is the Philippines and sadly, our indifference to the LGBT, in general and the trans-genders and ladyboys in particular, made it happen.