From forbidden love to lechon, and 27 years of marriage

Whether it’s the story of Cinderella or Snow White, the romance between a dashing prince and a beautiful damsel in distress never fails to tickle the imagination of Filipinos, who often feel soppy during the “marry month” of June.   In my youth, I did feel tempted to equate love with chivalry and courtly manners, just like in fairy tales. But so far I haven’t fallen into that trap, for which I thank (and blame) my parents. You see, for the past twenty-one years, this old man over two hundred pounds and a woman eighteen years his junior have been reminding me everyday that love comes in many forms.   They quarrel over the simplest things, making me realize that love is not always mawkish and sweet. When they fight over crispy lechon or green mangoes because of allergies, hypertension, and cholesterol, I know that they are really looking out for each other, even as they cheat on their diets.   What struck me most about this odd couple, however, was the way they reconcile day after day, without any need for apologies.    Age didn’t really matter   When Manuel Lamentillo and Elnora Yu got married 27 years ago, no one thought they would stay together. He was 47 and she was 29, and back then, their age gap was not acceptable to most people, especially my mother’s family. Everyone wanted her to marry someone her age, preferably of Chinese descent. But when their families realized that it was more than just a summer fling, and the two would fight for their relationship, everyone had to give in. My mom would often tell me, “They didn’t know about your dad or the marriage until the invitation was printed. Everyone was crying at the wedding.”   Of course, it wasn’t easy. My dad had to learn Chinese, and give up his leather jacket for red, long-sleeved shirts. My mom had to board a ship for one year, and refrain from flying when they were traveling together.   "We couldn't ride planes for the longest time, after your dad experienced an emergency landing. He was firm about riding boats," she recalled.    They also had to learn to live far from each other most of the time, as my dad happened to be a captain whose work required him to be on a ship eleven months a year. The job entailed many hazards.    “There was a time I got a call from the company saying your dad was critical, and will be undergoing an operation in New Orleans,” she recalled. My mom felt helpless as they could only communicate through telegrams, which were paid per letter, and calls that went through operators.   Another crisis came up when his ship capsized during one voyage. “When your dad's ship sank, he was left in the middle of the Indian Ocean with only a piece of wood, a little supply, and a radio,” she said. “Good thing that radio still worked.”   After twenty-seven years, their life has been far from perfect, if you believe in fairy tales. My dad is no prince charming, and my mom is no Cinderella.   But really, there comes a time when one has to stop looking for a knight in shining armor, and maybe opt for someone who’s a little fat or geeky. He just could be the perfect partner for a girl, June bride or not, in a marriage that ends happily ever after. – YA, GMA News