How to be happy: 5 ways to better mental health and well-being

It's often easier said than done: Stay positive. Be happy!

But especially during a time like the pandemic, keeping positive and hopeful  requires enormous emotional and mental strength.

Thankfully, it's not impossible. There is a relatively new branch of psychology that can help all of us “live a worthy life.” It's called Positive Psychology and it focuses on one’s well-being. The area of study investigates the positive things that we can add to our life to make it good, if not better. 

According to clinical psychologist Jade Cuambot, the study helps "identify the strengths that you have, the strengths you can still develop, and hone these strengths and use it to your advantage.” 

In an online interview, Cuambot explained that Positive Psychology utilizes the PERMA model. 

PERMA is an acronym for the five things that can most definitely lead us to our well-being. 

1. Positive emotions

There are “big 10 positive emotions” we can feel each day: love, gratitude, interest, pride, inspiration, serenity, hope, amusement, and awe.

A 2001 study by Dr. Barbara Fredrickson said positive emotions can actually be learned or cultivated over time.

For instance, when you're able to feel joy into your daily life, you can actually train your mind to not only recognize the emotion, but also become familiar with where you derive it. 

When you're able to do this, you're able to train your mind to think and act in a more positive way, which can result in resilience.

To help you get better at feeling positive emotions, some recommended things to do are listening to uplifting music or podcasts, having a gratitude journal where you list things and events that you are grateful for, an even practicing loving-kindness meditation.

2. Engagement

It's good to engage yourself with activities that “ignite passion and interest,” activities that really allow you to achieve flow.

“[When we say] flow, you are so into what you’re doing to the point [where you don’t notice time. It’s been hours but you’re still enjoying what you’re doing,” Cuambot explained.

To put it shortly, it’s living in the present and being focused on what is currently served on the plate.

Apart from participating in hobbies you enjoy, you can also improve your engagement by spending time in nature, practicing living in the moment, savoring, and observing things around.

3. Relationships

No matter how introverted we think we are, the truth of the matter is that we are a social creature and our well-being is largely dependent on social connections or relationships. 

But it's not just any old relationship that can help in our well-being. It's positive relationships — connections where we feel safe and secure — that play a vital role in our mental, emotional and physical health. 

You might want to rethink relationships, where your boundaries are not observed and respected, or those that make you feel like you're walking on egg shells. There is a reason those are often labeled as "toxic."

According to Cuambot, “[It’s not wrong] to burn bridges if these bridges are actually already intoxicating.” 

To build healthy and positive relationships, one may join a group with the same interests; interact and be friends with new people; or get in touch with loved ones.

4. Meaning

This circles on the ability of a person to find meaning on what they are currently experiencing.

“Whatever it is that we are experiencing, there is a meaning on why we experience that,” Cuambot said.

“Identifying meaning to our sufferings will allow us to make a better point of view of the things that we are experiencing or encountering,” he added.

Where meaning can be found, however, will depend on a person.

Apart from the self, others may choose to shed light on important factors that may directly or indirectly affect one’s situation such as societal issues and politics.

As encouraging as it sounds, doing these isn’t as easy as 1-2-3. As an initial step, one may try getting involved with organizations with an advocacy or using one’s passions to help to others.

5. Achievement

In Positive Psychology, it's important to experience "a sense of accomplishment on a regular basis.”

Simply put, it’s “building appreciation” for the small things like sleeping eight hours, eating a healthy meal, meeting your daily step goal of 10k — celebrating small victories.

Reflecting on past successes and setting goals will definitely help, but you may also look into how you can celebrate your wins, even the little ones.

Happiness and well-being don't have to be the big, grand plan. Stacking these small little things — abiding by the PERMA model — can actually boost you well-being.

But there were other things too that can contribute to your happiness. For instance, leading a healthy lifestyle is essential. There are food items you can eat — like bananas, dark chocolate, berries and coffee — that can help improve your mood.

And then there's the science behind working out. Apart from releasing endorphins, aka the happiness hormones, a 2013 study found that increase in movement also decreases symptoms of depression, anxiety, and loneliness. It also paves way for better focus and clarity.

Before you start begrudging exercise, know that the American Psychological Association said it only takes five minutes for a moderate exercise to give a “mood-enhancement effect.” 

Another one is getting seven to nine hours of quality sleep every night.

Can the PERMA model be followed even without professional help?

While it is possible, Cuambot said it may be a difficult ride without proper guidance from mental health professionals, the psychologists and psychiatrists.

He added that while positive psychology is also an approach in psychotherapy, it doesn’t usually stand alone. In most situations, it comes with other forms of treatment and is used only in certain situations.

“You cannot slab on positive psychology when the client is already hopeless. You can’t tell them, ‘Oh, you’re hopeless now. Look for your strengths,’” he said in a mix of English and Filipino.

“It can be used in mild cases but in severe [ones], it’s just supplemental,” he added.

As such, when you need or know someone who needs to talk, don't just force on the PERMA model. It is still recommended that you consult with a psychologist or psychiatrist, when needed.

Still for the lucky few who might just need to nudge, it's good to know there are small things that we can do to achieve a happy life. — LA, GMA News

If you need or know someone who needs to talk, Hopeline, the 24/7 suicide prevention hotline, may be reached at (02) 804-4673 or 09175584673.