Dawn recalls first love in Marie Claire

Actress Dawn Zulueta figured in one of the most talked-about issues last year — her rift with fellow actress and friend Gretchen Barretto. While Brretto was very vocal about detailing and reacting to the events that led to their disagreement, Zulueta chose to say almost nothing. "Things have been blown out of proportion. I have no issue with anyone... What's important is that I have my integrity, my credibility, my work... I do not grandstand... Let her tell her story... Ang stand ko is silence. I don't lose sleep thinking about this. I don't obsess with it. My conscience is clear," was Zulueta's brief and carefully crafted statement in this month's issue of YES! magazine. But in the January 2007 issue of Marie Claire, Zulueta was very open in sharing some of the "firsts" in her life. Here are some of those "firsts" that the actress revealed in her interview with Lou Albano. The first time I fell in love: "It was so painful. I was in love with a man who didn't even notice me.... I carried a torch for him since I was 10 years old, until I was 24, when he got married. I will not say who he is but he knows. I even had the guts to tell him.... He was so shocked. He never knew. That's why it hurts." The first time I dated a rock star: "I was already an actress [when I dated drummer Miguel Ortigas of Razorback].... Once in a while, I wanted to shed the [actress] image because I had this other part of me that loved music.... I loved the loud music and the energy.... But the late nights and the drinking, those were hard for me." The first time I regretted saying "no" to a project: "Lino Brocka's Gumapang Ka Sa Lusak (1990)... The script and the role of Rachel, a starlet who is involved in an affair with a mayor, called for a more daring performance, and that was to have sex with the character of Eddie Garcia. I was just not prepared. I was 19 or 20 and I did not know where I could get [the strength].... The only thing I regret was not working with Lino Brocka." (The role eventually went to Dina Bonnevie.) The first time I felt I made it as an actress: "It was when I was nominated for two categories in the 1992 FAMAS awards for Best Actress in Hihintayin Kita sa Langit and Best Supporting Actress for Una Kang Naging Akin, with Sharon Cuneta. I won both in one night." The first time I thought I may never experience motherhood: "My husband Anton [Lagdameo] and I had been trying for six years, but failing. On the sixth year, we decided, ‘Let's not think about this anymore. Enough.' If God wills it, it will just happen. I decided to go back to work so I'd feel that I still have a purpose.... After I signed the contract to do Encantadia, boom! I was pregnant." The first time I realized what my calling in life would be: "After getting pregnant, I realized that acting is what I really wanted to do.... acting is not something I can live without. I missed my creativity in front of the camera." To read the full article, get a copy of the January 2007 issue of Marie Claire — available in all leading bookstores and magazine stands nationwide. - Philippine Entertainment Portal