Mirror, mirror, on the wall

“Mirror, mirror, on the wall.  Who's the fairest one of all?” So asked  Snow White’s evil stepmopther in that classic children’s fairy tale. In the story, she had one magic mirror who told her all the time how she’s the fairest (except the last time when the answer turned out to be Snow White). But in my case, I have three mirrors, and they come with names–Raine, Aidan, and Aaron. When I gave birth to Raine, it was literally like looking into a mirror. I could see my features in her tiny face. And since my mom was able to save my old clothes and pass them on to me, I remember I even used to dress her up in my vintage garb. I’d take a picture and put it side by side my old picture, kinda like a Spot the Difference game.   But more than the physical features, what really unnerved me was seeing my behavior in her. To say that she’s my mini-me would be an understatement. She would parrot everything I say, have the same mannerisms, the same temperament, even reason out the same way. Sometimes, I’d only realize that I did or said something because Raine imitated me. Once, I remember telling my mom about something Raine did, and ending with “it’s scary seeing your child grow up just like you.” My mom’s retort? “Buti alam mo nakakatakot ka!” Seriously though, my friend Tina and I have this theory that our kids tend to inherit specific genes of us parents. But once transferred, the genes mutate into something much worse, into something totally unrecognizable. It’s like they become mutants in the mold of the X-Men. In the case of my children, it seems this theory is proving to be quite true. In Raine, I see in her my strong will and independence, but also my stubbornness. I see myself in her when she reprimands her brothers; when she puts her hands on her waist and wags her finger at Aidan whenever he does something wrong; whenever she frowns and furrows her brows in concentration; when she sighs in exasperation and frustration every time Aaron doesn’t listen to her; even how she phrases certain words. But somehow, she seems to be more stubborn, more strong-willed, and more obstinate than me. With Aidan, I actually see traces of my dad’s personality. He’s very outspoken, very much a people person, and is not afraid to try new things. But Aidan is also very much like his father Aldrich in that he can be very frisky and active (in short, malikot). I remember my in-laws telling me stories about how extra-active my husband was as a child. At times though, Aidan can be too much of a daredevil, ending up with more than his fair share of bumps and bruises. Now with Aaron, it seems like he’s a combination of both me and Aldrich. Like me, he is stubborn, strong-willed and obstinate. He knows what he wants and is not willing to back down at all. Like his father, he is very malikot and is quickly becoming a smaller version of his brother. Quite the deadly combination, if you ask me. A church adviser once shared in our church cell group that our children are like mirrors of ourselves. They reflect all the good and bad things about us, even things that we don’t like seeing about ourselves. She said that it also shows the state of our relationship with our God. And you know what? She was right. Whenever I get mad and reprimand my children for disobeying me or doing something I don’t like, I’d realize that I’m doing the same thing to God. Like our children, how many times do we do something wrong, ask for forgiveness, promise not to do it again, but commmit the same mistake the next time?  That’s exactly how we are with our Creator. Whenever I complain about my children not eating right, or not eating at all, that’s probably the same complaint God has about us not reading the Bible. And during times when we fret because our kids don’t want to talk to us or tell us about their day, that’s probably how God is also feeling whenever we don’t pray to Him.   So now, everytime my kids do something wrong, I’d usually stop and think: “Am I doing the same thing as my kids? Am I also behaving as badly?” That’s why lately, I’ve become quite thankful that I have three mirrors at home. That’s three more chances of seeing what’s wrong with me, and three more chances of improving myself. That way, I can be a better parent, a better person, and a better me.