The allure of frats: Why teens join despite the risk of hazing

Jojo (not his real name) was just 14 years old and in first year high school when his friends convinced him to join a community-based chapter of a fraternity.

“Actually it was never my intention to join any frat. Napasali ako kasi (almost) all my neighborhood friends joined one by one. Isa na ako sa pinakahuli[ng sumali]. I was a nerd talaga, not really sociable, an introvert. Napa-oo na lang ako siguro out of peer pressure. Sabi nila, 20 paddles lang, tapos na,” said Jojo.

He said there were other fraternities who tried to recruit him and his friends, but they were drawn to the fraternity because of the camaraderie they saw among the brothers or brods.

“Sounds silly, pero iba 'yung camaraderie nila. Walang tawagan ng 'Pare' o 'Chong'. Dapat ''Tol' or 'Brod.' If not, you'll get whacked in the head,” Jojo said.

“And I noticed kahit iba-iba kami ng ugali, we learned to understand and respect each other. [Our fraternity] kasi is non-exclusive. Walang criteria for joining. Kaya may brods ka from Forbes Park to Smokey Mountain. Sabi ng master ko nu’ng initiation ko, ‘Ang tunay na kapatiran ay hindi tumitingin sa antas ng iyong pagkatao sa lipunan, sa lalim ng iyong bulsa, sa uri ng pananampalataya mo o sa iyong pinag-aralan. Mamahalin mo, uunawain mo, at ipagtatanggol mo ang iyong kapatid hanggang kamatayan.’ Lalim, ‘tol, ano?” said Jojo.

Josh (not his real name) was just 19 when he joined a fraternity for medical students at a university in Manila. Like Jojo, he didn't intend to join a frat. However, he found himself one day tagging along with a friend to an orientation for interested applicants because of the promise of free snacks. “Sabi ko, ‘Sige, pero hindi ako sasali ha? Makikinig lang ako,’” he said.

However, as he listened to the senior members of the frat deliver speeches, he was in awe. Among the speakers were the president of the student council and other campus figures. “Hindi ko namalayan, after the orientation, naba-baptize na ako, nagre-recite ng oath habang pinapatakan ng kandila ang mga palad ko. Masakit pala pero walang burn marks,” Josh said.

Tony (not his real name), meanwhile, was just 17 when a close high school friend invited him to join a frat in a Quezon City university. “The frat is quite prominent on campus. One would know about it even without promotional posters and activities,” he said.

Paddles and errands

Jojo, Josh, and Tony soon found that joining a fraternity is not that easy. After the orientation came the initiation, which came in stages.

“As neophytes, we had to undergo two-week initiation rites,” Josh said. During class hours, they were “immune” but after classes, they were required to go to the frat house from 5-9 p.m. to do such tasks as cleaning restrooms and  memorizing all the names of the brods including alumni, their specialties in the field of medicine, and even hospital numbers. “Failure to do these would entail punishments like push-ups and other exercises like squats, full-knee bends, et cetera,” Josh said.

The neophytes had a batch leader who is supposed to lead the batch well. Whenever a neophyte commits a mistake, the batch leader's punishment would be twice that of the neophytes. And should one neophyte quit, the batch leader will take the brunt of the punishment.

Josh said they had a Grand Initiator who saw to it that the rules were followed: No alcohol, no public humiliation, no sexual abuse, and only the prescribed equipment are to be used on specific body parts (slipper for slapping palms; leather part of the belt, not the buckle, for hitting buttocks, thighs, calf muscles, gastrocnemius area, and the deltoid muscles). “The head, neck, chest, abdomen, and groin areas were spared all the time for safety purposes. Anyone who violated these rules would be disqualified from attending the (final) initiation rites,” Josh said.

One weekend was spent overnight at the frat house where neophytes had to perform song and dance numbers and comedy skits. “Kailangan nakakaaliw or matatawa sila sa jokes dahil kapag hindi sila natawa or naaliw, palo kayo sa puwet or hita,” Josh said. “May tawag na ‘basketball,’ ‘yung ngunguyain mo ‘yung hilaw na okra at ipapasa mo by mouth ang nanguyang okra sa bibig ng co-neophyte mo. Para daw hindi ka mandiri sa ka-batch mo,” he added.

For the final week, neophytes had to go to different hospitals to pay courtesy calls on alumni brods and do errands for them. Then comes the final initiation rite.

Since Josh’s frat is for medical students, the neophytes are made to undergo ECG, chest x-rays, blood tests with complete physical exams. They are made to sign a “waiver” saying that if something happens to them, the frat will not be held liable.

The neophytes are also made to draft a last will and testament which will be “notarized.” Senior frat members would brandish the huge paddles allegedly to be used. They would also bring stethoscopes, blood pressure apparatus, IV fluids, intubation kits or ambubags, medications, and emergency kits “aside from panakot, for safety purposes na rin in case meron magkaroon ng anxiety or panic attacks or any form of emergency situation,” Josh said.

But the frat has a brod who will look out for the neophytes’ welfare. He would accompany the neophytes and caution initiating brods if they go overboard. “Kaya hindi ako nagtataka kung bakit walang med student ang napapabalitang may namatay. Halos law students yata,” Josh said. He added that there are even ice bags which would be applied on the neophytes after they are hit.

Such was not the case with Jojo. After he joined the community-based fraternity, he joined a chapter in his school in Makati City. “With that, may paluan uli ng paddle,” he said.

“'Yung sa akin, I received more than a hundred paddles, not including belting on your back and candle-melting. ‘Di pa kasama ‘yung mga suntok at sampal kung saan ka tamaan. Sorry, ‘tol, pero brutal talaga. ‘Yung legs ko, upper, lower, sides at harap, ‘di lang nag-hematoma. Talagang pumutok ‘yung balat. And by the way, ‘di ako nakapantalon. Bawal ‘yun. Naka-shorts lahat ng pumapasok. By the way, solo batch ako kaya mantakin mo, nagsimula ako ng 12 noon, natapos ng 7 p.m. And every member has to endure that same situation,” Jojo said.

Paddling was the main activity during the final initiation, said Jojo. He also had to swear allegiance to the frat while the master whipped him with belts on his back while he lay prostrate. Candle-melting followed. “May Indian trail din where you have to run the course where the masters can hit you anywhere, free for all. ‘Pag nadapa ka, malas mo,” Jojo said.

Tony was also made to do certain tasks as a neophyte, such as washing cars or delivering packages. The final initiation, he said, was difficult. “It brought out both the best and worst in me as a young person,” he said.

No quitting

In all these, why did they not quit?

“There is stigma in being a quitter,” Tony said.

“Why did I not quit during the course of the initiation? Well, if you were already black and blue, and aching all over, your desire to complete it is paramount. Andun na, kahit anong mangyari, tapusin ko na,” Jojo said.

For Josh, thoughts of quitting fled from his mind even before the final initiation rite. During the final week, “mahirap nang mag-quit at this point. Kasi madami na ‘yung mga sacrifices naming ginawa.”

Looking back, they all said it was worth going through the whole ordeal.

“That thing made me stronger later in life. It made me always think that whatever life throws at me, I can overcome it if I pursue it. It made me more resolute as a person considering I was a weakling and a coward,” Jojo said.

Tony said physical initiation “was necessary to forge a fraternal bond between brothers, who would otherwise be just friends, even strangers.”

Josh said the same thing. “After the initiations, nararamdaman ko kung gaano kalalim ang ugnayan namin ng mga ka-batch ko. Iba. It was only two weeks pero parang we’ve been through hell and all of us survived by helping each other and staying united. After this initiation, I felt the seed of brotherhood planted inside all of us,” he said.

Hazing

All three of them are aware that a number of neophytes have died over the years due to hazing during initiation rites. The latest casualty, University of Santo Tomas law freshman Horacio Castillo III, allegedly died after enduring hazing during “welcoming rites” of the Aegis Juris fraternity on September 18, 2017.

READ: LIST: Hazing deaths in PHL, 1954–present

Fraternities that participated in a roundtable discussion organized by the National Youth Commission in 2014 swore they do not condone savagery in the course of accepting new members and yet the practice continues among other frats.

“I would want to totally scrap the physical hazing of our frat,” Jojo said. “Magulang na din ako. And I would not want anybody inflicting harm to my child. It is really nonsense, pero sad to say, mahirap baguhin ang tradition na kinagisnan na. I do hope that it will finally stop. [We need] tougher laws. And also I hope colleges and universities impose strict rules governing frats.”

Josh said the hazing deaths posed a big challenge to their frat, and heated discussions ensued. “As early as the Aquila Legis incident [neophyte Lenny Villa died in 1991 after undergoing initiation], our frat stopped hazing or any form of physical contact against the neophytes... We had to craft more creative ways of initiating neophytes by promoting our ideals without physical or psychological violence. One way of doing this is through the merit system,” he said.

“Maybe it’s high time for fraternities to stop competing on whose initiation is most challenging, most difficult, and most notoriously popular. Maybe it’s time for the brotherhoods to have brotherhood among themselves and help each other meet their goals and craft more creative ways to hold initiation rites to avoid these unnecessary fatal incidents. Or maybe it’s time for us to realize that acceptance, approval, self-esteem, and pride can be achieved in non-violent means like developing our talents and skills through a new era of better evolved fraternities,” Josh added.

Looking for acceptance

Josh nailed it when he mentioned acceptance.

According to Dr. Gigi Cuisia-Cruz, pediatric and adolescent medicine specialist at the Philippine Children’s Medical Center and The Medical City, teens have that urge to find their own identity and establish independence from their families. “They slowly, but some drastically, move away from the home and find their own way at the same time wanting to belong and be accepted. The feeling of not just belonging to a “barkada” but belonging to a prestigious, elite group is what pulls them into fraternities. Also, knowing that there is exclusivity, and that they have a group that they can call their own is very attractive to the teens,” Cuisia-Cruz said.

Add to this the fact that teens think they are invincible. “This thinking makes them high risk takers and thrill seekers. The teen brain, being still functionally undeveloped and a work in progress, can also explain why they are not able to process the consequences of their behavior and why they are still lacking in their judgment... They act impulsively rather than taking time to think things through in most of their decisions in a given situation,” Cuisia-Cruz said. “Putting these in the context of a teen undergoing hazing, they would rather take on the pain of physical violence rather than be humiliated of being taken out of the group or to be called a ‘quitter.’”

Cuisia-Cruz said the feeling of security, knowing there are people who will stand by you, also lures teens to joining fraternities.

However, if home life is stable, this may not be the case for some.

“In a home where love and acceptance abound, joining a fraternity is not really appealing,” Cuisia-Cruz said.

Career move

Josh, Jojo, and Tony were one in saying that joining a fraternity helped them in their careers due to the support and connections among the brods. Josh is now a doctor, Jojo an architect, and Tony a journalist. Cuisia-Cruz said this is indeed one advantage.

“Hanggang ngayon, ‘yung mga referrals ko come from my brods and vice versa, and we maintain communications with each other. Parang Mason ano? Hahaha!,” said Josh.

“Actually it did [help me in my career]. My brods were of all different walks of life. So I have clients or have been endorsed to prospective clients by brods,” Jojo said.

“Many brothers are in positions of power and were able to help me in my career as news sources,” Tony said.

Another advantage to joining a frat, Cuisia-Cruz said, is the honing of leadership skills.

As for disadvantages, Cuisia-Cruz cites the tendency to abuse power and resort to violence since not all fraternities screen their members and officers on psychological and psychiatric well-being and soundness.

Should teens and young men join frats? Such a decision must be discussed well with parents, Cuisia-Cruz advises. “They should study well the mission and vision of the fraternity, what they stand for, and most importantly, why you want to belong to this group,” she said.

Cuisia-Cruz advises against joining frats doing hazing. Also, “there should be clear rules in place and transparency and accountability is practiced particularly in the recruitment of new members,” she added.

Although there is nothing wrong in wanting to belong to a group, Cuisia-Cruz said there are other better options in finding one’s self and independence. “Parents must find the balance in letting them (teens) go yet watching their teens from a good distance, ready to be there anytime they need us. Important to build self-esteem or self-worth in their children earlier on so that when the time comes that this is challenged, they can make better decisions regarding their safety and health,” she said. — RSJ, GMA News